Feeling Good About Saying No

Whether you’re a parent, professional or anyone else trying to fit too much into your busy life, one thing we all have in common is the need to look after ourselves.  Funnily enough, loving ourselves is not necessarily foremost in our minds; we are usually too busy saying yes and looking after everyone else so your own needs fall to the bottom of a very large pile.

Carrying other’s burdens at your own expense, or never knowing how to stop and rest, is a sure fire way of burning out, or at the very least becoming resentful.  That’s where it’s crucial to learn how to love one self enough to know when to put yourself first. 

During a recent ThetaHealing™ session I worked with Jayne, (a healer herself), because she was having trouble with managing her workload and life: “I have to do everything I’m asked to do, I can’t ask for help – that would mean I’d failed.  I am a perfectionist.  Being able to be self-sufficient and independent were highly valued in my family and stopping to take a rest was seen as a copout or just plain lazy – so I just keep going until I drop – only then am I entitled to rest”. 

Jayne felt truly incapable of managing her hectic life, so we worked on her underlying beliefs of failure and its consequences; and how her perfectionism could both serve and harm her. This kind of inner stress can contribute to conditions like chronic fatigue where we’ve ignored our body’s signals to rest, so it finally takes control and makes us rest. 

I then used a ThetaHealing™ technique that teaches us positive new feelings in an instant – these included how to see herself as important and valued; that it was possible for her to control her workload; to know how to feel successful and how to live without feeling a failure if she sought help; that it’s possible to ask for help whilst also valuing the gifts of her perfectionism, self sufficiency and independency; and a new balanced definition of rest, relaxation and allowing her body to recharge itself.  Jayne was also intuitively taught how and when to say no; and how to set boundaries before she needed them.

These changes allowed Jayne to recognise her achievements and the space to instigate some other simple solutions in her life: scheduling her diary with time out for holidays and days off – both were a marvellous psychological and physical help.  Jayne got back into eating a good nutritious diet; she remembered to take her supplements; she also had a regular medical check-up to rule out any underlying causes for her fatigue; and she finally began to get regular rest and recreation away from her clients’ needs; everyday exercise found its way back into her life and she found time to have lots of fun with those she loved. 

Jayne has learnt the valuable lesson of how to love herself enough to know when to put herself first, which in turn transformed her life through her new practice of knowing when and how to say the simple little word – no – and feel good about it.

 

Image by Michal Marcol

What could be stopping you finding lasting love?

My client Margaret had a clear idea of what she desired in a partner but had experienced many unsatisfactory relationships.  When she came to me she still believed love was possible but was disheartened because she felt each relationship was just a copy of the last one. Her family experiences had been complicated with an alcoholic Dad whom she loved but felt was unpredictable and untrustworthy.  Once into a relationship her stress levels would rise and she’d want to run away and hide.  Relationships had become scary and painful and she wondered if she wouldn’t be better off alone. 

With her permission I cleared her feelings of being confused and unworthy of love.  She was eager to know how and when to trust others; that it was possible to take the next step and live without stress. Margaret accepted healing so she could feel truly empowered to create the security and lasting love she knew she was capable of.  With this fresh perspective Margaret felt it was now safe to let someone in to love her and it was time for Margaret to reassess the attributes she desired in her life partner. These changes brought her soul mate into her life.  She returned to see me one year later, living her dream – happily married and expecting her first child.

Never give up on love – difficult feelings don’t need to be permanent and can be replaced with pure positive feelings of being cherished, nurtured and loved.  Exploring and healing your issues during a ThetaHealing™ session could change your life forever and open the way for you to meet your soul mate.  Loving another fully and being totally loved in return is one of the best feelings on earth and one we deserve to experience.

Finding Lasting Love

More people than ever desire to spend their life with their soul mate, that special someone who will flow compatibly with them, so they can share a lasting love as they walk through life and beyond.  Soul mates are a combination of intense physical attraction as well as mental and spiritual magnetism.  We’ve known our soul mates before, so along with recognition when we meet there’s a deep and complete connection.

We’ve probably all got more than one soul mate out there, so when we meet new prospective partners it’s essential to figure out if your feelings are real or based in physical attraction.  It’s up to you to choose what you want.  In ThetaHealing™ we teach you to ask for your most compatible soul mate to be brought to you and that they have some specific attributes you desire. 

Put some thought into figuring what you really want in a life partner – laughter, love and lust are magnificent; but if you’ve children from a previous relationship you’d want your new partner to see you all as a package deal.  If you want monogamy – ask for it; even the gender you prefer.  If you simply ask for unconditional love a dog could be the answer to your prayers.  So make your request as specific as possible, put out your manifesting prayer to the universe and then allow it to bring that person to you.

(Image by Ponsuwan)

 

ThetaHealing™ in New Zealand Woman’s Day Magazine

Recently I collaborated with Michelle Buchanan to write an article on ThetaHealing™ for her regular spiritual counselling column in the NZ Woman’s Day magazine.  The column has been presenting various healing modalities that are on offer and it was fabulous to have ThetaHealing™ included. 

Through Cancer with Love – How ThetaHealing™ Can Help

When I encounter cancer in my clients I’ve found the best way to bring healing is to love the cancer and to avoid intuitively sending it fear or stress.  As a ThetaHealer® I always go into the body with love – the best healing energy to help us overcome any obstacles.

Hidden beliefs can foster illnesses like cancer, or our conditions can serve us in some surprising ways.  Unexpected benefits can be as simple as ‘when I’m sick I get love and attention’ or ‘when I’m sick it brings my family together’ or ‘now I’m sick I can finally rest’. None of these would be conscious choices but they can be cleared and changed with love.  Clients can be taught how to feel loved, know their family will hold together when they are healthy; and how to rest without needing to have cancer.   Some clients need to know they can find their purpose again, to heal and carry on with life.   Frequently ThetaHealing™ belief work is all that is needed to allow the body to return to health.

Severely sick clients have often exhausted their abilities to positively influence their health because some treatments can be debilitating; the fight has been going on for too long or the disease has recurred.  This last issue can be extremely discouraging and be accompanied by thoughts of ‘I’m not sure I can fight this a second time’ plus fears of again needing lots of support from loved ones. ThetaHealing™ has a fabulous ‘Healing for the Broken Soul’ that gives clients back their ability to rebuild and rejuvenate themselves.

As a ThetaHealer® I know that ‘The Energy That Moves In All Things’ can heal us and I’m trained to use my theta brainwaves to intuitively witness unconditional love healing all levels of my client.  In one recent case of bowel cancer I ‘saw’ the tumour shrink and completely vanished – this was later validated by my client’s oncologist.

Once a client is on the road to recovery we usually spend a session working on the next steps in their life.  What will they do once the round of treatments, supplements and special diets has finished?  It’s essential to be able to envision resuming a healthy, joyful and satisfying life.